November 04, 2007

Space invasion

No, not little green men from outer space (or inner space). Rather, people that can't seem to keep the fuck off my ass while standing in line. Yo, heads up jackass, if I'm standing about 3 feet from the person in front of me, it probably means I don't like to be close to people. Especially in the drugstore pharmacy line. Why? Because you fuckers are sick. That is why you are in this line. You need drugs for something. Whether it be a festering vagina or the sneezy wheezer with the need to continuously clear the throat.

I say, back off before I hand your balls to you in a jar. Seriously. Is it that hard to not stand right behind me and not breathe on me? Can't you understand we aren't living in Japan or Korea (or even Europe) where people are accustomed to being hemmed in near others because there is a lack of space. People. Seriously. This. Is. America. Back OFF.

I read an article some years ago about a study done on violent felons. People convicted of assault and murder. They were placed in a room and asked to tell when their space had been violated or when they felt someone was threatening them. The more violent the criminal, the further the ring of space around them needed to be before they felt someone was 'messing with [them]'. Interesting. In many cases, this space was more than 15 feet away. Now, I'm not suggesting that you stand 5 or more feet away from someone in line and thus breaking the continuity of the line, but surely you can give me my 3 feet? Either that, or give me the courtesy of a reach around will ya?

7 Comments:

At 4:18 PM, Blogger Buffalo said...

In Japan they wore masks to keep from spreading germs. Maybe you should wear one to keep from catching them.

 
At 8:29 PM, Blogger SS said...

I hear ya! I need lots of personal space. But, I don't think I'll murder anyone for crossing my personal space threshold though ;)

 
At 9:53 PM, Blogger Lord Chimmy said...

Yeah, I don't dig it when people get all close either. I find it especially bad when I move away and they move closer.

Back off, MFer!?

 
At 4:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, I work at a bank, and worked on the front lines (read:Teller) all through college, and you'd be surprised how close some people stand to others who are at the teller window transacting business. I actually had to tell quite a few people to back off and respect the privacy of the other customers. Some people just crave human proximity, I guess.

 
At 1:12 AM, Blogger Thérèse said...

I tend to react without thinking.

"YOU'RE IN MY BUBBLE."

Like with me, people probably just want to smell your hair, though.

Hey, I didn't say it wasn't creepy.

 
At 1:17 PM, Blogger JLee said...

This is one of my pet peeves as well. I often get bumped in line and wonder if they really think that's going to help them get anywhere faster!

 
At 12:07 AM, Blogger G3T Films said...

I'm a violent criminal and I like people being close to me... reeeeal close.... no, no, no, not that close, back away dude, here let Mr Knife show you how close...

And if that's not crazy enough for you, I'm alone right now...

um...

 

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