April 15, 2006

Getting it done

I seem to be able to be that guy that can 'get it done'. I recently closed on a condo. After I'd signed the paperwork with my realtor, I realized I wanted him to give me back half of his commission. I didn't feel he was doing any of the 'work' he was supposed to be doing. He also made the mistake of telling me that this sale was a 'gift' to him. He put up a good defense, but ultimately, I got my way. He required paperwork from the builder and the lender. Heh heh... no problem. Then he hedged and said his broker wouldn't allow him to give me the amount I wanted. Yep, I called the broker, explained my position and played my ace in the hole. See, the 'paperwork' the agent required wasn't a stock item. They had to be created. So, I had the lender and the seller include the amount I wanted back. lol My agent didn't really talk to me at closing. Nor did he give me the gift basket that a real estate agent normally gives to a client. What do I care? In his words, "You seem to be really good at accomplishing the impossible."

You want more? Oh, dear. There are so many. Let's see, I'm the first person in the history of my University to graduate without taking Algebra. Yep, paid for the class at least 4-5 times, couldn't seem to show my work, so I never passed. (Or I dropped it.) Anyway, I wrangled with the Dean and ended up not having to take it.

Instead of a BFA, I have a Bachelor of Science in Fine Arts. Yeah, you figure that one out, you let me know. I've never heard of a BSFA before either.

I convinced a creditor to retro-actively remove some information from my credit report resulting in a 104 point gain in my credit score. I did it with a simple phone call.

When I went to college, I received acceptance to two universities. I did so without ever taking an SAT or ACT test. I remember the final interview at one of the schools. Older man, very distinguished behind his too large and ostentatious desk. Flipping through my file. "Well, it looks like we've got everything we need to admit you except your SAT score." Me - "I didn't take it." Him - "That's OK, the ACT will work." Me - "I didn't take that either." Him - "The PSAT?" (The PSAT is a preliminary SAT). "Nope." Him - "Well, you're going to have to take one of those tests before we can admit you." I sat for a few seconds and considered his position, then I leaned forward in the squeaky leather chair. "Look, do you want my money or don't you?" He blinked a couple of times and then smiled, "Welcome to our school, we look forward to seeing you this fall."

Yeah, it's all about finding the motivator. Often times, it's a simple matter of convincing people that they want to help you because it's in their best interests. Or you make them feel good about themselves for doing something for you. This doesn't really match what professionals say, but hey, go with what works. Last year, someone gave me the following quotation, since that day, I've seen the validity in it. “When you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true“. Paulo Coelho from “The Alchemist” The bottom line is that I really want things to happen. Strangely enough, they do. What's your dream?

April 14, 2006


My yesterday's are all boxed up and neatly put away.

- Sheryl Crow

A fantasy these lyrics represent. A dream, a curse, a modern reality. Things are never so simple as we'd like. Time passes, but old wounds survive to cause pain when we least expect. Going someplace far away doesn't make things more clear. Alone, we never really find the solace we'd like to find. Scabs ripped away in a moment of weakness. An itch that cannot be ignored. Fresh blood flows from long sealed pains. The fresh bite cleansing and pure. Created by our own hands. Our own volition.

So many sources for internal misery. Sinkholes in our psyche that remain hidden and secret. An outward surface of peace and clarity. Underneath, revealed to be murky and unsure. Dangerous and going into depths unknown. They say you are fine, that everything will be OK. Left to wonder why. Left to wonder how to hide. To find a place to start over and be the way you hope and dream.

Don't you know why I cry? Or is it, I never said I'd cry...

April 09, 2006

How do you see

Did you ever want to be with someone just to watch them? To see their reactions to the world around them rather than see the world through your own eyes? To see their simple delight at a flavor. Or to hear them sigh in content as a breeze blows through their hair catching a few strands and pulling them across their face. To see the corner of their eye scrunch up as they let out a peal of laughter they simply can't contain. To hear the sound of their voice as they respond to someone entering your space. To see their brow furrow up as they concentrate on something that confuses them.

To see their peace as they sleep nestled on the couch with a book or magazine that held their attention just long enough for Father Time to take them on a new journey. To watch them when they can't see you even though you are in plain view. Their attention rapt and keen on some far off detail in the horizon. Then to gather them in your arms and know that they make you feel like nothing ever has. To make you wish you could freeze time to that small moment. To replay those reactions again and again in your mind. Feeling the truth in their reaction is more pure than your own. Innocent. Captivating. Not you. Them. All them. All encompassing.


As we begin the journey along the path of fables and legends. Our story to become epic adventures and tales. The proportions never keeping with the power of the moment. Soft heartbeats in the night more powerful than any thought of knights and ladies. No fair maiden to compare to the beauty I see. No prince to fill your ears with resounding words of fervor and passion. Simple touch, simple words become all we need. Locked away for all time, peaceful orchards with treasure yet to bear fill my mind. A soft caress a magnificent touch empowered with your soul. Your being transferred. Connected. Ware the doubts, the whispered shadows in our minds, treacherous untruths. Seek instead the bright fields burdened with strong grains and the sweetest fruits.

April 05, 2006

I never...

I had a conversation with a friend some time back. I don't recall the friend at this particular moment, but the words still ring loud in my head.

We were talking about compliments. This person said to me, "The best compliment you [MM] can give is when you say, 'I never thought of that before."

I was taken aback by this thought. That someone would feel complimented by me saying, 'I never thought of that before'. Granted, I think way too much, but you know that because you read my blog. If something needs to be accomplished, I can usually think of three ways to do it. And if those fail, I've usually got more in the dim cobwebs in my head.

I'm not all knowing, I'm not omnipotent, I simply think a lot. About a wide range of topics. My mind is a sieve, constantly sorting data and making patterns where none previously existed. I've demonstrated my thought process for some people who are typical MBAs, and they look at me in awe. "How do you do that?" I just do. Some creative people define creativity as intuition. I think what they really mean is it's automatic. Just like pulling your hand away from fire because it burns, the creative mind makes connections and links through an invisible often intangible web.

April 03, 2006

You might be a redneck if...

I think I finally made redneck status. Let me describe. You be the judge.

I went to Starbucks this morning before I showered. Yes, smart-ass, I did brush my fangs before leaving the house... ewww... I haven't shaved in three days. Starbucks is about a 1.5 block walk from my house, so... I had on cargo shorts and and bright orange Aqualung T-shirt. Since it's only 54 degrees, I opted to throw on a jean jacket. Now, the jacket I chose happens to be a Harley Davidson 100 year Anniversary piece with a large graphic embroidered on the back. To tame my unruly mop (which hasn't seen a stylist in 7 weeks) I pulled on a Potawatomi Bingo Casino POKER baseball cap. To top off the outfit, I slipped my feet into some Brazilian Havaianas flip flops. Off to Starbucks I meander. I threw my back out, so I can't move very fast. So picture that.

I get to Starbucks and order. I look like trash and I just ordered a $4 cafe mocha and a blueberry muffin. Then, I paid with a Starbucks card. Ownership of such a card is just ridiculous, but it beats having to whip out cash to pay exorbitant prices for coffee that is actually bitter to begin with. The whole purpose of the trip? To put something in my stomach so I can take a muscle relaxer for my back. Doh.

April 01, 2006


the tempest squall of my mind
brings forth no pleasure
no endorphin rush occurs
i live i breath i simply am
accept not the dreams
the visions, the delusions
face the whirlwind
smile despite it's biting sting
lingering in past reverie
no longer a viable medication