Crevice

deep down inside
where you fear to look
where you fear to tread
your own soul devours
born of necessity and pain
tears the fabric you hold dear
thoughts ripped asunder
flailing obliviously
unclench your fists tomorrow
grasp the thin fabric
of sweet sanity

Dixie chick?

Dixie cans and fryin' pans
Twirled away in a twister
Don't be callin' her sister
She's a country gal
Inhabiting those honkytonks
her feet are clad in cowboy boots
She wears her jeans to the dancin' line
Heel, toe don't you know
Beware her wrath all down the path
She won't be home on Friday night
So don't be callin' all hot for a date

In a nutshell

Blogs I thought of Writing this week and didn't.

I had quite an internal dialog on what kind of person it would take to be an executioner or a torturer. I was thinking about the Salem witch hunts and the mass of killings in europe. Once upon a time we have executed people by burning them, breaking them on a wheel (this involves chaining them to a wagon wheel and breaking their limbs), placing them in Iron Maiden's, and many other ways. Hanging was particularly popular, but if the rope is too short, then the person dies a slow painful death of strangulation up to an hour long. Too long a rope and the head pops off (this is what happened to Saddam Hussein's brother. Anyway, this blog didn't get written for various reasons.

What else did I pass up. Oh, back to toothpaste I finally opened the new tube of 'citrus sparkle crest'. It was ORANGE. WTF? I guess I should have been clued in since a third of the package is orange, but really. Not what I was expecting. As for the taste, they won't be winning any prizes with this stuff. I'm not quite sure what ass tastes like, but imagine it then cross with oranges and you might have an idea of the flavor of this stuff. I'm giving it one more try and then it's going in the proverbial trash.

Then there was the FUCKTARD drivers that seem to inhabit my area of the world. Let's see, it snowed (is snowing) and the roads are icey and slick. FTs think they can go as fast as they want 'because I have 4 wheel drive'. Said FT didn't bother to think that his/her brakes aren't going to have quite the same effect as 4-wheel drive when they try to stop and drive up my ass. Here endeth the rant on that.

What else? One of my favorite wine makers in California, HESS came out with a new wine. It only has their name in fine print on the back of the bottle. This in and of itself should clue you in to what is inside. To top it off, it comes with a screw-top. At $5.99 a bottle, it's not quite 2 buck chuck, but it's close. And to make it clear it's not a great wine, the label reads something to the effect that it's great with pizza, bbq, etc... yep. Giving the low-class the low-down on what to eat with your wine is a surefire winner.

Those are just a few of my bloggy thoughts this week that didn't quite reach fruition. Thanks for playing and dont' forget to share with the other kids in the class.

One fine day

A man's man. Corvette collector, pipe smoker, meat packing plant employee. John was 'the corvette guy'. He collected them. Quite a thing to collect, corvettes. His wife left him according to the neighborhood women's gossip I eavesdropped on because he loved his cars more than he loved her. I'll admit, as a young child, I loved seeing his '55 or '56 red and white convertible gliding up the street in the parades. I still couldn't grasp him loving his cars more than his wife. Years later I know there must have been other things, but I'm not here to talk about relationships today.

The backyard of his house, just down my ally turned into a monster garage over the course of a few weeks one summer. 6 cars fit in the shine to automative perfection. As I reflect back on that garage today, I wonder just how he got a building permit for such an ugly structure, but he stored his favorite babies in that garage. He had more than 20 other corvettes stashed away somewhere else.

There was a white birch tree perched in his front yard. A large beautiful tree that dominated the neighborhood with it's unique look. White bark gleaming in the evenings when we'd sit outside and watch the sun go to bed for the night. I'd often smell John before I'd see him on those nights. He had a routine of walking the neighborhood sidewalk with his pipe. You could smell the perfect scent of pipe tobacco from a few hundred yards away. A distinct masculine smell that went with his rugged good looks and 70's mustache.

9.9

Humans seek perfection. We are always looking for the perfect thing or experience. From a flawless diamond to a perfectly cooked steak. We run the gamut. We look for perfection in others, in ourselves. We never find that perfection because it doesn't exist. Nature doesn't build perfect things. Nothing in nature is truly symmetrical.

Perhaps that is where perfection lies. In imperfect things. Taking joy in the simple pleasure that can be found without looking too hard. Simple pleasures abound in our lives. The sound of laughter (perhaps the one perfect thing because it's a reflex.) A cool breeze stirring our hair. Soft snowflakes drifting out of the sky. Waves crashing on the beach.

Untitled

living
an idyllic dream.
floating
on mists of memories.
buoyed
by tomorrow.

Are we there yet?

I'm not a patient man. I hate standing in lines, I like to provide immediate feedback when something pisses me off and when i'm working on a project, i like it finished sooner than it could possibly be accomplished. Of course most of us don't like standing in lines. It's loathsome. There is nothing to do unless you are a crackberry addict. Perhaps that's why they are so popular. Finally, people have something to do that doesn't intrude on others people's sensibilities.

I purchased a new humidor after my little vacation to Brazil. You'd think hey, open the box add water to the humidor and place your cigars therein and you are done. Nooooo. You have to season the damn thing. This entails water voodoo to get the relative humidity level to 70%. It can take a very long time. There are methods to cheat the system, but of course your humidor may suffer consequences later.

So, I sit and wait. I go look at the humidity level every time I go near the box. Is it 70% and stable yet? Nope. I had it over 80% last night, but this morning, we are solid on 68%. More waiting. Is there a line I can go stand in to make time move faster? Sigh

Bless my fangs

Have you looked at toothpaste lately? I mean really looked? I was at the grocer yesterday doing a little shopping and remembered I was getting low in the tube at home. I wandered over to the pharmacy section and found the toothpaste section. About 15 feet long and 4-5 feet high. When I was a kid and Crest was fighting the Cavity Creeps with their tooth walled city there were roughly three kinds of toothpaste, Crest, Colgate and Aim (?). I'm sure Pepsodent has been around awhile, but Arm & Hammer didn't make toothpaste back then. Nor did half the other name brands I saw.

OK, so getting past the major manufacturers, then you have the sub brands. Whitening this, cavity that and flavors. Vanilla toothpaste? WTF? I'm gonna wanna eat every time I brush my teeth. Isn't that kind of self defeating? I mean seriously, I'd spend the day between the kitchen feeding my face and the bathroom brushing my fangs. (No Bufffalo, I didn't steal this from you, but I was delighted to hear you say fangs instead of teeth).

Back to sub brands, the Crest website shows 12 categories of toothpaste and each category then has sub brands. The liquid Gels Category has 12 brands listed including Spiderman. Then at the bottom, there is a link to the actual Gel Toothpastes which has 11 more brands. How am I supposed to choose the right toothpaste for me?

I don't have a lot of brand loyalty when it comes to toothpaste, I generally like something with a swirl of gel in it, but I couldn't find one yesterday. The basics seem to have disappeared from the shelves. I think I ended up with something with Listerine added to it. Great, now I don't need the mouthwash step anymore. Can we get any lazier as a society? Gimme some basic toothpaste that fights cavities and keeps my occasional cigar smoking, wine drinking teeth semi white without the need for invasive dental efforts and I'm good. Anyone else with me on this bandwagon?