April 25, 2008

Ever forward

Some people look at adversity and see only opportunity. A new hill to climb, a new challenge to overcome. It gives them hope of finding their way in the world. I would guess that the previous description is something many would say about me. In an interview recently, I was asked my greatest strength. I accomplish the impossible. I think I've posted about that before and this post isn't about that. I wish I was one of those people that look at adversity and smile. I don't. Really. I look at adversity and say fuck you. Actually, it's probably more on the lines of FUCK YOU. I don't like to lose and I have found myself not trying things because of fearing failure. I fear a lot. More than I ever believed I could. I've written a lot about fear, but it doesn't go away.

I wrote something earlier today that struck me with an odd clarity. Tomorrow is not Today. Pretty simple. And so not. The map of the paths in my life are so utterly tangled I barely see the one I'm on. So closely intertwined that I can hop from one to the next with seeming agility and ease. Or is it confusion and lack of attention? Perhaps that is what drives those that look at adversity and smile. It's an easy path to see. Focus on that goal. Rage is perhaps your friend then. Drive and energy pushed from within in a narrow bridge that allows no obstacles.


At 5:36 PM, Blogger Buffalo said...

Adversity is rarely personal. It is almost always a worthwhile learning experience. Anger when facing adversity is rarely productive. When two people of equal skills face off it is usually the one with the cool head that will prevail.

Tomorrow doesn't exist. You have this moment. Use it. Enjoy it.

At 10:07 PM, Blogger Buffalo said...

Are you still in the land of the living?

At 7:54 PM, Blogger Still Searching... said...

Rage and sweat inducing fear have always been my dearest friends when facing adversity (of a certain kind). It spurs me along to conquer and prevail. Which I don't always do, but I'll always go down swinging, and that makes me smile.


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